According to Inc.com, Tom Hanks’ success was dependent on a single word: “No.”
This may be surprising to many, as most imagine that the path to success requires jumping at every single opportunity, no matter how small or silly it may seem.
However, according to the beloved actor:
“I realized…that I had to start saying a very, very difficult word to people, which was ‘no.’
The odd lesson for that is, I figured out that’s how you end up making the favorable work you do…Saying yes, then you just work. But saying no means you made the choice of the type of story you wanted to tell and the type of character you want to play.”
Hanks’ advice isn’t just great for actors. In any job, it can be rewarding to turn down certain tasks, especially as you gain success and have the freedom to do so. However, you must take advantage of it.
Hanks isn’t the only one who believes in the power of “no.” Jony Ive, Apple’s design chief, recalled that Steve Jobs would ask him the same question almost daily: “How many times did you say no today?”
Knowing when to say no, Ive said, made Jobs “the most remarkably focused person I’ve ever met in my life.”
Psychology Today adds that although saying “yes” supports risk-taking, courage, and an openhearted approach to life, saying “no” reflects a surge of strength. Although “no” is often associated with negativity, saying “no” can be a positive point for many individuals. It allows us to set limits and assert ourselves against others.
However, saying “no” too often can be limiting. How can you tell when you should say no?
First of all, if saying no keeps you true to your principles and values, then by all means, say no.
Additionally, saying no can protect you from being exploited by others. Some people will take and take and take, so long as you let them. For those who feel entitled to ask so much of you, don’t be afraid to tell them no.
Say no when it helps you focus on your own goals. For example, if you are regularly volunteering to assist others at work with their projects, to the point where your own projects are suffering, you must learn to say “no” once in a while to ensure you are meeting your own professional goals.
Protect yourself from abuse by others by saying “no.” In your personal life, there may be people who treat you poorly, yet you still spend time with them or you do not know how to address the issue. Setting boundaries and saying “no” may make the other person upset temporarily, but in the long run, your relationship will benefit.
Finally, when you need a change in life, saying “no” can be a relief. Perhaps you’re making hundreds of thousands of dollars a year, but you have to travel nonstop and you’re missing all of your children’s milestones—their first steps, first visit from the Tooth Fairy, and the first day of school. Saying no helps you turn things around if you are traveling down the wrong road.
Every day, whether we are employees at the bottom of the totem pole or the owners of a multimillion-dollar business, we are faced with choices. Do you take the meeting? Do you risk a new venture? Which task should take priority? To decide, think about what you want to accomplish—not just in the short term, but over the next several months and years as well. Allow that thinking to guide your decision-making.
After all, every time you say yes to something you don’t want, you are saying no to something that you do want.
Source: Inc.com
Photo credit: lifehacker.com
