To Successful People, Acknowledgement Does Not Necessarily Imply Agreement

People are often under the false impression that acknowledgement of the ideas of another person automatically implies agreement. This flaw in understanding marks the difference between popular and unpopular persons and in many cases successful and unsuccessful ones. So, what's the big difference? Well, most of the habits that keep us from being empathetic listeners, like interrupting people in the middle of their speeches or ignoring to acknowledge when others emphasize ideas, all stem from this tiny misconception of confusing acknowledgement with agreement.

A little patient hearing without interruptions and with supportive nods can go a long way in opening up, developing, and strengthening relationships. However, most of us are scared that our silence may be taken as acknowledgement, and that in turn may imply agreement in social communication. So, whenever we are not in agreement with an idea, we jump in and interrupt the speaker to emphasize our difference in views, and prevent the speaker from thinking otherwise.

It's one of the easiest ways to hurt ourselves, our relations, and our career prospects. It makes us seem boorish, insensitive, and distasteful company. And the worst part of the entire scenario is that our reactions are based primarily upon a misconception - that acknowledgement always means agreement. This gives rise to false safety concerns and turns us into poor and impatient listeners.



Listening with empathy helps us to win the trust of the speaker and the skill relies largely upon supportive acknowledgements like ''okay,'' ''I see,'' etc. Such acknowledgement signifies temporary acceptance and accommodation of the speaker's point of view and encourages him or her to express views in a better manner. If one wishes, any idea can always be logically contradicted by presenting a personal point of view when the time comes. Speaking out of turn is disrespectful and in many cultures, it amounts to insulting the other person whose speech is interrupted.

To truly be a good empathetic listener you need to both encourage and guide the speaker in expressing his or her thoughts. There are some common traits shared by all good communicators and empathetic listeners:

• Never interrupt the speaker unless extremely necessary
• Be patient, and extremely so
• Encourage the speaker
• Guide the speaker
• Never put the speaker on the defensive in the middle of a speech
• Avoid direct questions unless extremely necessary
• Repeat important statements of the speaker as questions
• Be careful about what the speaker is not saying
• Even if the speaker asks for your honest opinion, keep from expressing thoughts that can influence or inhibit the speaker
• Be neutral and play your part, do not become emotionally involved
• Win the speaker's confidence

A successful person is a good listener, and any good listener acts supportive to others when others try to express themselves. Good listeners are never judgmental and easily win the hearts of people. Blossoming relationships increase your chances of professional success and one step ahead of others who are quick to shove their own opinions in your face.