What's Your Conflict Management Style?

This simple test will help you handle confrontation like a pro. Whenever people spend significant amounts of time together, conflict inevitably arises. The test of a true professional lies in the manner in which they handle such disputes in the workplace. An important first step is understanding your personal conflict management style. The following quiz will help to determine yours.

Whenever people spend significant amounts of time together, conflict inevitably arises. The test of a true professional lies in the manner in which they handle such disputes in the workplace. An important first step is understanding your personal conflict management style. The following quiz will help to determine yours.

1. When someone offends you, which of these best describes your typical reaction?



As encouraging as success stories can be, learning about another's failure can be just as inspiring.

1. I ignore it.
2. I try to understand why they are behaving badly.
3. I try to reason with the person.
4. I let them know firmly how I feel.

2. Conflict is brewing between two of your co-workers. You would be most likely to:

1. Avoid both of them until it is over.
2. Observe the situation carefully prior to acting.
3. Act as mediator.
4. Let them know how disappointed you are.

3. Your boss makes an unreasonable work request on a Friday afternoon that will take you most of the weekend to complete. What would you do?

1. Grin and bear it.
2. Find out more about why it is necessary, then comply.
3. Suggest alternatives to get the job done without working excessive hours.
4. Laugh and let the boss know that you have a life outside of work.

4. If a client or customer became angry and hostile, your reaction would be:

1. Remain quiet. After all, the customer is always right.
2. Hear them out, trying to understand their perspective.
3. Begin thinking about creative solutions to the problem.
4. Ask them to calm down and then loudly explain my position.

5. You've just had a huge misunderstanding with a co-worker. How would you resolve it?

1. Leave it alone.
2. Wait a few days before initiating contact. Time will put things in perspective.
3. Make an effort to talk through what happened
4. Try to get the person to understand my position.

6. A co-worker is taking advantage of you. How do you react?

1. I just accept it.
2. I try to figure out why he or she is acting this way.
3. I persuade them to change their ways.
4. I "have it out" with them.

7. A heated argument breaks out during one of your meetings. How would you handle it?

1. Adjourn the meeting and leave.
2. Keep quiet and watch.
3. Try to facilitate the discussion.
4. Take sides with the person who agreed with you.

8. My co-workers usually describe me as:

1. Quiet.
2. A good listener.
3. Convincing.
4. Bossy.

9. One of my greatest strengths is:

1. The ability to stay out of trouble with people.
2. Reading between the lines.
3. Persuading others.
4. Getting others to do what I want them to do.

10. When having serious disagreements with someone, I often:

1. Remain quiet and hope it blows over soon.
2. Listen and make sure I understand their point of view.
3. Think of ways I can get the other side to understand my position.
4. Continue talking until I am sure the other person understands.

Now add up all of your A, B, C, and D answers. Your conflict management style depends on which letter you chose most often:

A. Avoidance

You avoid conflict at all costs and go to great extremes to keep the peace. You often resent others, but actually keep your feelings hidden and repressed. Good assertiveness skills training would help conquer your fear of conflict and turn you into an impact player at work.

B. Analyzing

You have the ability to remain calm in the face of conflict and understand or analyze other viewpoints. Listening is one of your strengths, but you do have a tendency to cave in to keep harmony. If you work on clearly communicating your emotions to others, then both parties achieve a win-win solution.

C. Assertive

You are persuasive and adept in matters of negotiation. You love to win people over to your side. Conflict does not scare you and you are adept in matters of negotiation. You view conflict as a challenge and do not shy away from opportunities to manage it effectively. To improve your conflict management, try to focus on improving your listening skills.

D. Aggressive

You like to have the upper hand. Conflict resolution is hampered by your need to control the situation. You tend to "steamroll" over quieter individuals. To increase your successful conflict outcomes, work on softening your approach and listening to others. Remaining calm will actually give you more power.

Kathy Simmons practices what she preaches as the Assistant Vice President of Canada Life Assurance Company in Atlanta, where she is responsible for over 100 employees. She credits Art Sharp, her writing mentor, and Jim Freeman, her father, with providing the encouragement and inspiration needed to author many management and career articles.