Most bosses, after all, are good at giving orders, running meetings and refereeing disputes. Rarely are they trained in interpersonal skills, and even more rarely do they know how to conduct an interview. Therefore, during an interview, they fall back on using a resume (job history) as a means of examining the person on the other side of the desk. This puts the interviewee in a passive role - sitting back and waiting to be questioned.
But communication in its truest sense is a positive, active process. This is true whether it involves communicating a subject matter in a classroom (teaching), communicating washing machines to householders (selling), or projecting oneself across a desk to be more fully understood by an employer (self-communication). None of us can communicate effectively unless we exercise a minimum level of control over what is communicated and how it is communicated.
An interviewee is trying to "sell" the most complex and sophisticated product on Earth: A human being. In addition, an interview is a marketing situation in which the seller (the interviewee) cares very deeply about who "buys" the product (although too many people pretend that they don't care). And it's the only marketing situation I know of in which the product liter ally must sell itself. You can't send in a proxy to do the interview for you or send a product sample for the interviewer to try on his or her own time.
So you find yourself in a pressure-filled situation, trying to sell something incredibly complex and totally abstract - your talents - and to buy something which will satisfy something that is equally as complex and abstract - your needs. The chances are, no matter how good a salesperson (and buyer!) you are, you can't do it. It's exceedingly rare to find the person who has really studied himself or herself with the kind of depth and honesty needed to communicate one's true self (Beyond that, it is equally rare to find the person who has studied and developed the professional skill required to project that true self effectively. Both are necessary; both can be learned and developed.)
How do you gain this kind of self-knowledge? The fastest and surest way is to enlist the services of someone who knows how to help. And there are many self-help books around that can help you open some of your inner doors. But in substance, it's a matter of a great deal of introspection. As you go through this process, it's also important to honestly acknowledge where your true interests lie. Too often, people deny their true interests and fall back on their training or cave in to family pressure. But if you have a clear vision of what you want and a determination to get there, it will make it all that much easier to communicate your true self to others.
Having gone through this process, you then need to do the following:
- Acknowledge in what field your true interests lie.
- Carefully examine that field to determine what price you will have to pay in order to enter it and succeed in it.
- Determine whether you're willing to pay that price.
- Don't give up.
Too often it is merely the fear of the unknown that keeps people from pursuing their dreams. However, nothing is more impressive than the individual who is absolutely determined to make something work and won't be stopped until it does. And that is most definitely a part of communicating yourself. There's an old saying, "If you think you can or you think you can't, either way you're right." It's the absolute truth when it comes to communicating your true self and being at your most credible with an employer.
