Now that better jobs in the workplace are no longer male monopoly, there is a great deal of natural confuse about the "new rules" of etiquette between men and women working side by side. While this confusion is natural outgrowth of a shift in the role of women in society, it needn't be as stressful as many people make it.
The best approach, I think, is for a man to natural practice the sort of courtesy toward women that he is taught and grew up with (assuming, of course, that was taught the proper etiquette with the opposite sex.) When a man meets a female colleague for the first time by all means he should reach to open a door through which the two of them will pass. If she accepts this gesture graciously, the man should make a mental note that with this particular woman it's all right to open the door for her. The same applies to standing when she enters your office, or helping to remove her coat.
If you are a woman, you can minimize confusion or social awkwardness by having a clear sense of the extreme to which you will accept male courtesies in the work place. If a man reaches to open the door and you prefer to open doors yourself, you should pleasantly say, "Thanks, I’ve got it." An astute male will note this, and the next time the two of you are about to go through a door, there will be no confusion.
These suggestions apply with colleagues with whom you work regularly. Obviously, if you're a man about to be interviewed for a job by a woman executive, and she personally escorts you to her office from the reception area, it would be inappropriate for you to open her office door. In this situation-as in virtually every other basic common courtesy practiced between any two human beings -behavior should be appropriate and prudent.
Avoiding confusion in today's workplace demands sensitivity on part of both men and women. Women who loudly crusade against any sign of male deference to them in such simple matters as opening doors or helping remove coats create tensions that are unnecessary. By the same token, men who are insensitive to the changing needs of the workplace only limit their chances of success. They end up offending their female colleagues.
Some men consider the gains made by women in the workplace "silly" and see having to change their chauvinistic views of women as an unnecessary intrusion into their lives. Men who carry that view into American business today are virtually guaranteed to find their advancement stymied. Women working alongside such men resent being called "sweetie" and "honey." Like it or not, the workplace is now and shall forever be a place of gender neutrality. Understand and respect that fact and the etiquette that goes with it. Those men who don't will have to settle for less in their careers.
So many rules of good business etiquette seem obvious, yet are broken every day. If, during an interview, the interviewer mispronounces a word, control the urge to pronounce it correctly. Better to avoid using it for the rest of the interview. Don't criticize the restaurant you've been taken to for the interview. And avoid anything that could be construed as argumentative: "You like the Yaikees? I think they're poorly managed and don't have chance at the World Series." You may be right, but unless you're interviewing for a job in major-league baseball confine those arguments to your baseball-loving buddies
Displaying loyalty is good business etiquette. Never bad-mouth former employers and colleagues, refrain from discussing other offers you've had, and don't give away trade secrets.
Leaving a job demands good business etiquette, toe Exit gracefully; don't compromise your chances for good reference. Be cooperative, and do everything you can to help your replacement.
Proper etiquette, business and personal, is mostly a matter of common sense. That does not mean, however that it should be approached only intuitively. Like man; things in life, there are rules to be followed, and these rules shift as our world changes. There are many source of information about proper etiquette in the workplace and I recommend that, in addition to learning the skill necessary for your chosen career, you take the time and make the effort to gain a firm grasp of proper etiquette in today's crazy world.
Reminders on Business Etiquette
Good etiquette means caring about other people.
Job seekers who don't know proper etiquette come off as unsure in all ways.
Once you learn what proper everyday etiquette is, you never have to worry about it again.
Order simple foods during an interview lunch.
Don't drink and don't smoke!
Don't bring anyone with you to the interview.
Be on time. In fact, be early, and use the extra time to prepare yourself.
Shake hands firmly, but don't overdo it. Maintain eye contact, but don't overdo that either.
Send a thank-you note right after the interview. Include something positive about you that you "forgot" to bring up during the interview.
Be pleasant and courteous to everyone. A secretary or receptionist can torpedo your chances. Learn the rules about business etiquette between the "two major sexes."
Etiquette is, in essence, courtesy as practiced between two human beings. The "rules" of etiquette make life easier for everyone. Playing by the rules means that everyone involved in any type of human interaction knows what behavior is appropriate.
