Warning Signs
The most important warning sign to look for is any sign of suicidal thoughts. Studies have shown that the risk of suicide can increase dramatically for someone who is unemployed. If your spouse starts saying he or she would be "better off dead" or that you would be better off with the insurance money, get professional help at once.
Although your husband or wife may not be suicidal, the devastation of losing a job may make it difficult for him or her to cope and move ahead with job search plans. If his or her depression becomes debilitating, you will need to seek professional help. Look for classic signs of severe depression: Your spouse may be unable to cope with even small tasks, and he or she may completely lose hope. At the same time, a depressed person can completely resist anyone's attempts to help him or her. If your husband's or wife's depression becomes severe, you need to seek professional help.
In addition to your spouse's reactions, you need to be aware of how the situation affects you and your marriage. If your own anxiety or depression becomes so severe that you are unable to cope, you need to find professional help for yourself. In the same way, if your marriage is in danger, if you argue constantly with no resolution, or if you begin to avoid your spouse altogether, you need to seek the advice of a professional counselor.
Where to Go for Help
Most importantly, don't think that professional counseling is one of the things you can just do without during a time of financial strain. There are a number of agencies and community organizations that offer completely confidential counseling services for a reduced fee. Some of the available options are:
- Local mental health centers. Almost every major city has a local mental health and guidance center that offers counseling services for a reduced fee. Look in your Yellow Pages under "Mental Health Services."
- Local churches. Churches of any denomination don't care if you are a member when you are in need of help. Most churches have support groups for unemployed people, especially during difficult economic times. If you need additional counseling, church staff members can refer you to organizations that can offer low cost counseling services.
- YMCA. Most YMCA organizations have a counseling center or can refer you to helpful organizations in your community.
- Local psychological associations and hospital referral services. Most psychological associations have a referral number you can use to get access to professional counseling. Look in your Yellow Pages under "Associations." Many major hospitals in large cities now publicize physician referral services you can call to get help.
- The Better Business Bureau. If you and your spouse have always had trouble handling finances, the consumer division of the Better Business Bureau can put you in touch with counselors who can provide low cost money management advice and assistance. If your credit cards were already up to the limit when your spouse was laid off, run, don't walk, to a credit counselor s office.
